Encouragement During Financial Difficulties

There is one thing the Bible makes very clear from Genesis to Revelation; God's kids have the best of things in the worst of times. God is not controlled by Wall Street. If He is not greater than government, He cannot be God. - John Hagee

Mighty Women of the Bible

There are these facebook quizzes you can take. I'm not sure who is writing them and what they are using for the research behind them. They're fun to take every once in awhile. I took one called "Which Mighty Woman of the Bible Are You?" and it came out as Sarah. Here's what it said for the results:

"Dedicated to your spouse/boyfriend, you would do anything for them. You also are a woman of faith, who takes God at His word. You have much wisdom, and are a role model to many other women, both young and old. Your life is filled with adventure, oft times and is unpredictable as you live a kind of "nomadic" existence as the Spirit leads."

I was surprised at the accuracy of the results because it is true that if I had a spouse/boyfriend, I would do anything for them. Taking God at His Word? Yes, I do that. When I read the Bible, I don't view it as just another book but as a Living Book. I believe that when I read the Bible, the words that are in it are as applicable for me personally as they were for those back in the time when it was written. Sometimes a verse will just leap off the page at me and strike my heart that I know the Lord is telling me that it is for me to claim.

My life is tough, but it has been filled with adventure and I try to follow the Spirit as He leads. When I graduated from GCU in 2008, I remember the baccalaureate service speaker telling us that if we give our lives to Christ, expect your life to become an adventure!

Endometriosis - What a Pain!

When I was 21 I was diagnosed with endometriosis after many years of battling monthly pain and being told to get up and move around, exercise, it was all in my head and what-not. The pain was excruciating and no one seemed to understand what I was going through. It was definitely not in my head and it was becoming dehabilitating and causing me to miss work every month.

Once I went in for tests, an ultrasound showed a growth on my right ovary and a laparoscopy confirmed that I had stage 4 endometriosis. The doctor told me the severity of it and when I asked him if I would be able to have children, he just looked down and didn't answer me. I looked at him in horror and said "Are you trying to tell me I can't have kids?!!!" He said that it would be unlikely. It was horrible news for me to hear. After all, my only real dream in life was to get married and have children. I really wanted to be a mom. Now that dream was being ripped away from me, just months after I had committed my life to Christ. I was a single woman and now that I knew I might not be able to have kids, what man would want me? Certainly not any man who wanted to be a father.

I was so mad at God. I thought He would make my life better and little by little He was taking things away. I used to have plenty of dates and boyfriends and now no one was asking me out because I was a Christian. I remember standing out on my balcony one night and looking up at the sky and telling God off and flipping the bird. Looking back on it now, I realize that was an awful thing to do but I was a new Christian and my world was falling apart.

We were changing medical insurance carriers right at the time I was diagnosed and they weren't going to cover me for the $189/month drugs I would need to take for the next nine months. My employer was an awesome and compassionate man who had treated me well. He called the insurance rep and said that if they didn't cover me, he wouldn't go with them. Needless to say, they covered me and I began a nine month regimen of Danazol.

Danazol is a synthetic male steroid which shuts down the ovaries for a time so there is no monthy cycle and you go into a pseudo-menopause. It lowers the voice, causes a boxy hip/waist shape and for some women, reduces their breast size significantly. It puts on weight and changes the muscular structure so that it looks like you're working out and ripped even though I didn't do any additional exercise or weight training during the time I was on it. I really didn't want to go on the drug but that was the best option for me at the time. Some of the side effects can be permanent. I prayed that if God was going to cause me to feel like a dried up female that He at least would allow me to keep some boobs. He answered that prayer, but I have never been able to get back to the weight I was prior to Danazol. I can be the same size in clothes as someone else and weigh 15 pounds more than them due to the muscle structure change. I also lost the ability to sing and went from a soprano down to an alto/tenor range and my voice cracks while singing.

Over the course of nine months I discovered that several other women I knew were battling endometriosis. One women had a full hysterectomy in her early 30's and another one was on Danazol too. Finally there were some people who understood. I found out that one of my aunts had never had kids because she had been diagnosed in her 20's with endometriosis and had a hysterectomy. Endometriosis tends to run in families.

The Danazol did what it was supposed to do and the endometrioma on my right ovary shrunk to the size of an almond after four months and was gone completely after nine months. As a maintenance program, I went on a birth control pill, continually, for the next 9-10 years with six month breaks from the pill every three years. I was able to maintain a pain-free life for several more years by being on the pill, but weight gain continued to plague me.

Some good Christian men started asking me out but once I told them about the endometriosis and the possibility that I might not be able to have kids, they immediately dumped me. The rejection hurt me, a lot. I still wanted to be married, and I still wanted kids.

I went to a Bible study in 1986-1987 and the leader of the study sent me a postcard and it said "I believe that you will bear children someday." I still have that card. Once I was reading my Bible and came across Psalm 113:9 "He settles the barren woman happy in her home with children." The verse sparked hope in me and I claimed it.

My First Teaching Job

When I began grad school I expected it to take two years of schooling before I would be able to apply for licensure. However, it came quicker than that. Grand Canyon University (GCU) told me in December 2006 that I should begin looking for a teaching job that would also count toward my student teaching. I found out that there's a Limited License option in Minnesota that allows teachers in training to be licensed to teach under another licensed individual.

I began looking on EdPost for business ed positions and the only one available was with an online charter school, BlueSky Charter School, based out of West St. Paul. It was a work-from-home position which sounded awesome to me! I called on a Sunday afternoon expecting to get an answering machine on which to leave a message, but the principal answered the phone. I inquired about the business ed position and explained my situation as a grad student. At first he said that I probably wouldn't qualify as new teachers typically aren't interested in online positions. When I told him that I've been behind a computer and phone for over 20 years and was very comfortable with technology, he suddenly became very interested and invited me to interview on Tuesday at 5pm.

The next day, Monday, I called GCU to ask if online teaching would qualify for my student teaching requirement. They said absolutely not, it had to be in a regular classroom. That was a bummer to hear... As I thought about it that evening, I felt it was probably not in my best interests to pursue employment with an online school if it wouldn't qualify for student teaching. I called the principal back and left a message on his voicemail telling him that I had to cancel our interview, due to the student teaching requirement, but hoped to be in touch with him in two years after I graduated.

The principal called me back at 7am on Tuesday morning! I later found out that he had gotten my message but when he called me he acted as if he hadn't and said he was calling to confirm that I was coming in for an interview that evening. I explained that I was sorry but had to cancel and had left him a message. He told me he thought that I could work for BlueSky and student teach elsewhere at the same time and they were open to discussing it and working out a solution! Wow! So I went to the interview that evening which lasted 1.5 hours and I was immediately hired at the end of it. They would sponsor my license and the business ed teacher, who had just been promoted to assistant director, would be my mentor. Suddenly I WAS A TEACHER! My career dream had become a reality!!!

As I drove home that night from the interview, I was dazed at how my life had suddenly turned around and could hardly believe I wasn't dreaming! Six months earlier I had been laid off from a corporate job and 20 plus years of deadend IT work. I had been working part-time for three months and struggling to make ends meet and had no benefits. I had been in grad school only a couple of months and then suddenly, in a little over 48 hours, I had gone from part-time Computer Lab Ed Assistant to full-time Business Ed Teacher!

I believe the Lord knew all along that He would answer my prayer for a new career by moving me in the direction of teaching. He knew this opportunity at BlueSky would come up for me and perhaps He had orchestrated the promotion of the current business ed teacher to bless both her and me. All the steps along the way, even my previous business experience, set the stage for teaching Business Ed. At the appointed time, everything fell into place.

God often works behind the scenes and we cannot see what He is doing on our behalf. Sometimes it feels like He isn't doing anything because He doesn't reveal Himself or His plans to us. But then He does what I call "a suddenly" and you get the breakthrough you've been praying and agonizing for! It's then that you realize that He was there all along, working out the details in order to bring delight to you with what He has done. To Him be all glory and honor!

Home Schooling

As a teacher with an M.Ed. in Secondary Education who had to go through major hoops to get certified as a business education and CTE teacher in Minnesota, I have a lot of mixed feelings about home schooling. I've met kids who have been home schooled successfully and who have small businesses of their own after high school or have gone on to college -- and I've met kids who were home schooled and they don't know how to read or spell well, and neither do the parents who home schooled them.

One thing I will say about home schooling is that typically the student is very respectful of adults and others. If they are from a Christian home they are often well-grounded in their faith. I do believe that home schooling protects children from the taunting and bullying that can take place in public schools and thus their self-esteem will be stronger.

A previously home schooled student signed up for one of my online courses. The parent called and complained to the school counselor that my course was too difficult and required too much time and they wanted to drop it. After talking with the parent and student, I discovered that they were only used to spending 5 hours per week on their studies for all of the subjects the student was learning. Certainly it was overwhelming for my student to suddenly have six courses and spend six hours per day studying. It was at this point that I began to seriously question whether home schooled kids get a quality education, particularly during the upper grade levels when math and science courses in the traditional schools contain geometry, trig, calc, physics and chemistry. Personally I would not be qualified to teach these courses to my children and I doubt whether all of the parents home schooling their children are qualified to teach those subjects. So how do they handle those subjects? Do they have someone else teach their children those subjects. Would that be legal if the person doing the teaching isn't certified to teach?

It is my opinion that the success of home schooling depends on the education levels of the parent(s) and their willingness to continue lifelong learning along with their children. It requires a lot of discipline and organization on the part of the parent(s) to set a schedule and stick to it when other things come up that may distract them during the day. The kids I know who are successfully home schooled also have a portion of their home dedicated as a classroom with educational decor and supplies. This helps to set the atmosphere that they are now doing their schoolwork rather than just playing in the home. Taking advantage of every educational resource available, learning to play an instrument, and participating in social activities at church and in the community will also help to contribute to home schooling success.

Life Begins After a Layoff

Late one night toward the end of March 2006, I flopped backwards onto my bed and asked God to find me another job. I told Him that I didn't feel like I was in the right place working at HTI and I was willing to make a change, even though it might mean not seeing dear friends on a daily basis and possibly leaving Hutchinson. I submitted a prayer to the Lord asking Him to find me a job that I would enjoy doing for the next 20 plus years. In addition to joyful work, I asked for enough money to make ends meet, for work that involved helping people and here's the long shot -- I asked for summers off so my children wouldn't be running around unsupervised as they grew up.

Two weeks later I got a six week notice that my position was being eliminated due to customer mergers. I was not surprised when I got the news -- and I was thrilled! I knew that God had begun to answer my prayer and I was excited for what the future held! People at work were surprised by my attitude as I continued to do my job with more cheerfulness than I had previously. Some thought I was in shock and didn't realize my situation, after all I was about to become an unemployed single mom. But I knew something good was coming!

The severance pay I received lasted me through the summer as I applied for various positions but only half-heartedly so. Being off for the first summer since 1980 was a treat and my children and I loved it! It was definitely something I could get used to but the bills had to be paid and fall was coming and the severance was almost used up.

A friend from church suggested I apply for a job at the Hutchinson Middle School as a Computer Lab Educational Assistant. It turned out to be a part-time job and the pay wasn't what I was used to making previously, but when I was offered the job I took it. The 2006-2007 school year began and when I walked into the middle school, I felt like I had come home. As I assisted the teachers and kids in the lab, I knew that I wanted to become a teacher. I loved working at the Middle School. For a time in high school I had considered becoming a teacher, but didn't want to deal with the classroom management aspect of teaching, and therefore had put it out of my mind and pursued other majors.

With a B.S. in Management & Ethics and over 20 years in business, my best option was to become a business education teacher. In October of 2006, I enrolled in an M.Ed. online program through Grand Canyon University in Phoenix, Arizona. (Please note that this is not the same school as Phoenix University.)

Little did I know that my journey toward becoming a teacher would become one of the greatest challenges of my life with many obstacles to overcome. Yet, it would also become one of my most exciting adventures!

A Balloon Bouquet and Flowers from God

As I was getting ready this morning I was reminded of a time back in the 1980's when I was in my mid to late 20's. I was living alone in an apartment in Bloomington and had been a Christian for about 2 years. I was finding the Christian life to be a struggle and not as much fun as I used to have before committing my life to Christ and pledging to follow Him.

One Sunday night as I was lying in bed feeling very single, lonely and depressed, I cried out to God and told Him that I wanted to know if He really loved ME -- or was I just one of billions of people in a huge blob of humanity to Him? I know that Jesus died for all of mankind and I was certainly thankful for that. But I wanted to know if He knew and cared about me as an individual. You may think that's a silly and selfish thing to think, but if you've ever been unbearably lonely in a large city surrounded by people, you might understand how I felt.

That night I asked God to show me if He loved ME in a way that I would know it was Him. I didn't specify how He should let me know. I just asked Him to show me. Yet, deep down, I really wasn't expecting anything to happen. I went to sleep and forgot about my request the next day.

I came home from work the following Wednesday and opened my apartment door. There in the hallway was a balloon bouquet! The balloons were attached to a long box on the floor filled with flowers and the milar balloon attached to it said "I LOVE YOU." I dropped to my knees with tears in my eyes. I had always wanted to receive a balloon bouquet with flowers and had never received one -- and no one else knew how much I had hoped one day to get one. Who could have sent them and how in the world did they get into my apartment? I opened the card which said "You are loved" on the front and inside of the card I was told I was special and how much God loves me. I suddenly realized that God had just shown me that He knew me as an individual. Only He knew how much I wanted a balloon bouquet with flowers and He was the first to give me one. My heart was overwhelmed!

I suspected that a human had to have gotten that gift to me so I called my landlady and asked if she knew if anyone had been in my apartment. She said a lady had come and asked to be let into my apartment and that it was urgent that she leave the bouquet. The landlady didn't let her in but took the bouquet from her and put it in my apartment herself. I got the lady's name and recognized her as someone from Grace Church Edina (now Grace Church Eden Prairie). She was someone I knew of, but not well at all. I called her up to thank her for the encouraging bouquet and she said it was from the Lord. She said the Lord had strongly impressed upon her spirit that morning that she should go buy me a balloon bouquet and flowers and write out a card telling me how much God loved me. I was totally blown away because I was virtually a stranger to her and yet she was willing to spend time and money to do what she heard the Lord telling her to do. She felt she was on a mission and rushed all over that morning to put together the gift for me, but had no idea she was being used to answer a specific prayer. I'm so thankful that she was willing to be His hands and feet.

The flowers are long since gone but somewhere in the many boxes in my house is the card and a balloon that says "I LOVE YOU." I will try to find it and am thankful that I was reminded of it today.

To those of you who are reading this post, please know that God loves you too, as an individual. You are not just part of the crowd to Him.